Yeah, the “Exploding Actresses” tumblr is sexist…

People tell jokes about violence against women all the time, either because they don’t realize violence against women is a cultural norm, or because they think laughing at said cultural norm will somehow make it less horrible. This is the only way that I rationalize the astronomical rise of the tumblr “Exploding Actresses” and the lack of any adequate critique of it as a form of Internet art.

As the title of the viral tumblr suggests, actresses explode. Not any random actress in any random movie either, these are actresses in movies very much beloved by women. There are GIFS, YouTube videos and stills.

“Have you ever imagined your favorite actresses and Disney princesses without heads?” opened one gleeful blog post about the subject. Huffington Post labeled their “hilarious” post about it “satire” but was unclear as to what was actually being culturally commented on: that women iconography was being destroyed rather violently, or that a male was behind it?

Them exploding is no big deal,  it’s a joke, it’s supposed to be funny, all the write-ups imply. This is problematic for a variety of reasons but Lindy West can explain those best somewhere else.

Perhaps the tumblr creator Simone Rovellini — who lives in a country the UN flagged for having particularly bad domestic abuse problem  – didn’t mean to be sexist with his movie choices or in picking the “greatest actresses in film history,” and merely chose the movies he did because the depictions of love in those movies make men’s heads explode. Or maybe he was implying that while watching these movies might make women happy, it will really leave them braindead. Oh wait. Both of those reasons are still sexist.

It’s interesting to note that as Rovellini’s mini-art project picked up press all over the world, he began exploding men’s heads in his work. Still only in movies beloved by women though. Hmm.


Asher_Wolf quits Twitter, probably due to sexism

asherwolf quits twitter

Sexism drove Asher_Wolf away from Cryptoparty and it looks like Twitter as well.

Last night she “ragequit” due to something related to hackers posing as “bronies” attacking her website? That is what the rumors on Twitter are saying, at least. I write “bronies” because Internet pranksters love disguising as them (or anyone they hate, really. The #cutforbieber folks, for instance, tried to blame it on 9GAG in various comment section of YouTube vlogs on the controversy).

asherwolf bronies hacked my site

The time stamp for the brony attack is from December, but the intention behind whatever drove the people to harass Asher_Wolf is still the same.

Her last tweet, according to Topsy, was “offline.”

While I had yet to attend a cryptoparty – it was on my agenda – I relied on her Twitter stream to keep me updated on all acts of Internet activism. She was in Australia, and her timing jived with my late night Internet wanderings when insomnia kicked in.

I get her point of not having to stick around and take abuse, but why quit Twitter when it was her site that was disturbed, not her news distribution service?

I feel like I am being punished.

1:30 pm Update:

On secondary inspection, it was probably the trolls that came out following her Aaron Swartz post.

asherwolf didnt read lol 1/16, 2:14am Update: 

Asher_wolf is back on Twitter, no explanation for the hiatus.


Surprise! Size matters in a porno video game

ESRB "Adults Only 18+" rating symbol...

Image via Wikipedia

I would first like to clarify that I did not play the entire game, just the demo (I am not about to pay for a porn video game, thank you very much). I would also like to mention that I have never played a porn video game, or an “action adventure porno game” before in my life.  We live in a world where a good chunk of our population plays video games, or watches porn, so it is only a matter of time before someone combined the two: hence,  Bonetown.

Even though the game came out in 2008, I found the cartoony ‘Bonetown’ the other day when this article was on the front page of digg. Other outlets have written about how “morally depraved”  Bonetown is, or how offensive the game is on a variety of different levels, so I am not going to go there in this post. Writes Jessica Wakeman over on The Frisky:

“Bonetown” touts itself as “the world’s first action adventure porno video game,” but it’s more like thoughts from the internet’s most ignorant trolls set to animation. You know, the trolls who think racism and sexism have been “solved” so it’s really hilarious to perpetuate stereotypes about minorities and women.

via ‘Bonetown: “The World’s First Action Adventure Porno Game

Bonetown is supposed to take place in some GTA universe, where everyone is running around drunk, stoned, or both, and you have sex right on the street. Because I was playing the demo, I was confined to this small area around a beach (here is some very NSFW gameplay in a trailer park that I did not have access to), and I quickly learned the world map. (The only building I was allowed to enter in the demo kept crashing my PC.)  I spent my time running around beating up Asian tourists or stoners and sexing up fat ladies.

Read the rest of this entry »


Top 10 sexiest male video game characters

The internet is littered with lists of hot female video game characters, I thought it was time I made one for the ladies. For you males about to protest my lack of steroid-using males, I refer you to this picture.

Number 10:

Miguel Caballero Rojo from Tekken 6

Choosing a Tekken character was difficult as the obvious choices are Jin ( “take me for a night ride, Jin!“) and Hwoarang (because he has pretty flowing hair, rides a motorcycle and can rock goggles).  What removed Jin and Hwoarang from this list is: both men weren’t consistantly attractive throughout the series. Hwoarang looks like a Neanderthal in Tekken 4  and Jin’s nipples were too weird in 4 & 5 to the point of distraction. Horns are only attractive on certain males, and Devil Jin is not one of them.

Miguel makes my number 10 because of his outfit, his sexy voice, his nonchalant manner, his swagger, and his need to seek revenge for his sister is somewhat noble and heartwarming. Miguel is only number 10 because he is too manly for me to handle and looks like a newly homeless pimp in his second outfit. Miguel, how is it possible that you can rock a matador outfit but not a long coat?

Number 9:

Ryu and Ken Masters from the Street Fighter series

Ryu and Ken are tied for 9th place because of this video from the animated Street Fighter series (apologies for the song).  Homophobes should not click on the hyperlink, or watch the video below.

If you can’t handle thinking about Ryu and Ken this way (prudes!), I present you with Tenacious D’s song titled Double Team to explain why I listed these two street fighters together.

Number 8:

Tidus from the Final Fantasy series

Despite their feminine features, Final Fantasy males have normal, attractive bodies (compared to say, the men of Gears of War). Squall Lionheart was my initial choice because brunettes are better than blondes, but Squall’s style and scar aren’t enough to overlook his character flaws. The same applies to Cloud Strife.  Why exactly does Cloud have that large of a weapon? His sword size makes me think he is compensating for something…  while Tidus is honest, speaks his mind, and has one of the best personalities of the main Final Fantasy characters. Cloud requires some warming up, while you  instantly like Tidus.  Tidus and Yuna also have a romantic underwater kissing scene. Tidus is only number 7 because of his clothing attire (inspired by fishermen? really?) and because of his age in Final Fantasy X: 17 is jail bait in some states.

Number 7

Fox McCloud from the Star Fox series

Fox McCloud is so foxy. Can you imagine cuddling with him? And his nice bushy tail? Sometimes I wish I was Krystal

[youtubevid id="K5ILCyhN_5c"]

Number 6:

Solid Snake from the Metal Gear Series

Even though Solid Snake is based off a variety of action movie heroes (but also Christopher Walken!), he is troubled and complicated.  I wanted to be his stay-at-home wife, and be his shoulder to cry on when he came home. From having to kill his twin brother, to constantly being pulled out of retirement, to killing his old mentor, to insane premature aging, to his multiple suicide attempts, Solid Snake had some issues to work out (and I am not even scratching the surface here).  I don’t think there is another video game character out there that I want to hold and comfort as much as I want to hold Solid Snake. Despite all his hardships, Solid Snake always maintains a level and calm head, is dependable,  and possesses MacGyver-esque capabilities (to be expected with his high IQ).  Solid Snake is only at number 6 (he could easily be number 3) because watching tribute videos of Solid Snake make me cry like no other video game tributes ever could. To add a touch of humor to an otherwise tragic choice, Solid Snake makes a great porn star name.

Number 5:

Dante from the Devil May Cry series

He has silver hair, is seeking revenge for his dead mother, has super powers, a great sense of style (notice the zipper over his crotch, and his trenchcoat), is generally witty,  and is demon spawn. I crushed on him so hard when I was a teenager…

Number 4:

David King from the Resident Evil Outbreak series

A man of few words, David is sexy as all hell, a badass, fires his gun with one hand in a nonchalant manner, has a great voice and is the true Macgyver on this list. Never in a million years would I think a plumber was sexy, but David King is the exception.  Yeah, the whole mysterious “rarely talk about my past or myself” is enchanting at first, but it gets old really quickly. The internetz say he had a short temper, but I don’t remember any of that… or perhaps I overlooked it because his ability to craft weapons from anything outshone his anger problem.

Number 3:

The Prince from Prince of Persia: Sands of Time

From the Prince’s poofy pants (very Aladdin-like!), facial hair, haircut and voice actor Nolan North, the Prince has earned the number 3 spot easily. The Prince is so acrobatic and graceful, thereby so fun to watch move… and despite the critics, I think the Prince looked great in Warrior Within and the subsequent versions, even if he stopped wearing the white poofy pants and became all doom and gloom.

Number 2:

Leon from the Resident Evil series

Oh Leon… he is such a gentleman. He’ll even take a bullet for you. If there was ever a zombie invasion, Leon is your man. Having been exposed to both zombie viruses (and a parasite), he knows the drill. When you first meet Leon, he is late for an assignment because he overslept- something I can relate to-  but by the end of the series, Leon has become a trusted Secret Service agent.  Besides his hair and voice, Leon has a great sense of style (even looks great in a mobster outfit) and is a friend to animals.

And while I know he is not related to the Kennedy’s, taking him home to my immigrant mom would win me some brownie points.

Number 1:

Desmond Miles from the Assassins Creed series

Yes, Desmond Miles is not the “assassin”, but you know by the third installment Mr. Miles will have all assassin  capabilities because of the “bleeding effect”. Desmond Miles has a sexy voice (Nolan North again), and moves like a panther ( I can gush about his swagger all day long), eagle, and ballet dancer all rolled into one. How many males can get away with that sideways cape, or those knee-high leather boots? No one but Mr. Miles. And you know under all those layers he has a fantastic body. The fact that I cannot see it makes him all the more attractive – there is much left to the imagination…

But most importantly, Desmond Miles looks like a normal dude, someone I can actually have a relationship with. His personal issues only make him more intriguing…what can I say, damaged guys have their appeal?

Honorable mentions include: Yoshi (all about the tongue), Max Payne, Dr. Gordon Freeman (his glasses and his field of study), and the demoman from Team Fortress 2 (his accent and eye patch).


New website lets male gamers pay to play with hot female gamers

OTTUMWA, IA - AUGUST 13: Five-time video game ...

Eh. I've seen hotter male gamers! Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Online gamers know what happens when a female (or a dude pretending to be female) joins a match. Every sex-starved dude pounces on her like a dog in heat. She doesn’t even need to speak if her handle contains words like “chick” or “lady”. You can guarantee that at least one tongue-wagging guy will flood her inbox with messages or attempt to harass flirt his way into her heart, completely unaware that she’s probably a hideous monster. On that note, it’s tough competing with all that testosterone, and even tougher finding a hot gamer girl, but that’s about to change, courtesy of GameCrush, the world’s first website that hooks you up with hotties who can handle two analog sticks at the same time

via Game Daily “Hook up with GameCrush”

This news is ridiculously apt, considering my latest post on gender issues in video games…

On one hand, this sounds like a great way to make some extra cash if you are an attractive lady, but at the same time, it doesn’t really help with the whole “women aren’t respected in the gaming industry” bit. Hmm…. 30 dollars an hour? Tempting, but I must remain strong on principle…

After a session you can rate your PlayDate on her hotness, gaming skill, and flirtiness. The highest-rated girls will receive preferred placement on the site. GameCrush is assembling a team of its most highly regarded PlayDates called JaneCrush, which should be similar to Ubisoft’s Fragdolls. Members of JaneCrush will generate content for the site like blogs and editorials. GameCrush wants to turn its most popular girls into gaming stars.

via IGN Xbox Live “Would you pay a Girl to Play Halo with you?”

This newest development might as well  say “only sexy ladies (or those that pretend to put out) have a place in the gaming industry”! And GameCrush wants to be like Ubisoft’s Frag Dolls? Please. The Frag Dolls are normal, respectable ladies that did not start out on some sleazy pay-to-play chat-roulette style game site.  I don’t know who is being exploited here, the ladies, or the “sex-starved”  males that would fork over cash…

Also, why isn’t there a website like this for girl gamers? I mean, there are some really atrocious looking male gamers and I would love to play with some attractive males.  Oh wait, I almost forgot, they wouldn’t make a site like this for women, because women aren’t that desperate-

Or maybe I am overreacting, and this will be the newest way for gamers to meet each other… What happened to the good ol’ fashioned way of falling in love with one another over the internet before you saw each others faces…. : /


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